Getting things done! Three tools to keep you on track.

~ Shirley Hilton ~ 6 Comments

It’s easier to meet goals when other people are expecting something from us – our boss, our work team, customers, family. We don’t want to let them down.

But when our goals are personal, it can be more difficult to get traction. We might put off personal goals because we think they only matter to us.

Implementing this simple three-step process can help.

One: Buddy Up!

Find an accountability buddy. Your buddy is someone who has their own goal to accomplish. They will commit to holding you accountable and vice versa.

You both agree to scheduled check-ins and complete honesty about your progress, or your lack of progress.

There will be times when you don’t make progress. After all, the whole reason you need a buddy is because you’ve been struggling to meet this goal on your own.

Continue reading “Getting things done! Three tools to keep you on track.” →

Beating Procrastination

~ Shirley Hilton ~ 4 Comments

Monday morning started out wonderfully! After a restful weekend and a good night’s sleep, I felt refreshed.

As soon as I rolled out of bed, I grabbed my coffee and did my usual morning writing. Perfect! This is a routine that rarely gets altered. It’s a habit I’ve created.

Remember the habit loop? Cue -> Action -> Reward. I was off to a great start!

It was one of those rare days when I didn’t have any appointments. I intended to get a lot of writing done!

What did I do instead? I procrastinated.

I showered quickly and headed out. I’d been out of town and wanted to reconnect with my friends at the neighborhood coffee shop.

None of the usual cars were in the parking lot, so I drove on down town for breakfast. I was halfway downtown anyway, right? And, I could swing by and pick up the mail.

After a conversation with the restaurant owner, and too much time reading the newspaper, I walked up the street to an art exhibition. Since I was in the vicinity, I’d snap some pictures of my friend Leonardo’s art. He’d asked me to. Continue reading “Beating Procrastination” →

Sit and think. Or just sit.

~ Shirley Hilton ~ 4 Comments

So much noise. So much advice. Everywhere we turn. From every direction.

Five things to do on a first date. Three ways to relax. The One thing you should never say in an interview. Seven signs you’re in a bad relationship. Ten life hacks to make yourself popular. Fours ways to lose weight. Eight habits preventing you from attaining your goals.

The messages here? You don’t know how to date, to relax, to get a job, to have a relationship, to make friends. You’re fat. And you can’t meet your goals.

You’re a mess! But we can fix you! Continue reading “Sit and think. Or just sit.” →

Listen up!

~ Shirley Hilton ~ 6 Comments

Do people interrupt you mid-sentence? Or start to answer your question before you’ve finished asking it? Do they talk over you? Are you the one who interrupts?

Good communication requires active listening. And active listening means engaging.

There is a difference between listening and waiting for your turn to speak. – Simon Sinek

Four Ways to “Up” your Listening Skills

  • Be curious. The word curiosity comes from the Latin “cura”, meaning to care. So it’s not only the desire to learn, it is also about caring. Neuroscience research has shown that curiosity stimulates learning and enhances memory.
  • Leave space for not knowing. The more expertise we gain in our field, the less likely we are to open ourselves to new perspectives. Even when you think you know the answer, make space for new learning. This lets the speaker know that it is safe to share ideas, and it opens the way to discovery and innovation.
  • Suspend the need to be right. Most exchanges are not win-lose propositions. Be open to contrary opinions. Finding even the smallest piece of common ground can pave the way to fruitful conversations in the future.
  • Adopt a beginner’s mindset. Be an explorer. In every conversation there is the possibility for new discovery. Favor asking over telling. Use phrases like: How would that work? I don’t know, what to you think? Tell me more.

Continue reading “Listen up!” →